Auditions, and How Badly They Freak Me Out

First of all, my disclaimer is that yes I know that I better I get used to them, considering the fact that I'm a theatre major. However, that doesn't mean that I am not allowed to get nervous about them, and dwell on them every waking moment. Yesterday were auditions for Dollhouse, and I think I did alright. But my problem is that usually whenever I think I've done well, I apparently didn't. Tonight are auditions for Titus Andronicus, and I think I am now slightly less nervous, however I can't eat without fear of my stomach totally freaking out on me. I'm glad that I have been through a Converse audition process, and I'm very glad that tonight is a Shakespeare audition. That makes me comfortable. But, it is still an audition. And auditions make me nervous. I don't know why. They just do. I need to get out of my head to act, but for some reason I can't do that at auditions. I think too much and then I just do terribly!! Then I can't stop dwelling on how terribly I've done. And then I get nervous for the next audition!!!! It's a very vicious cycle, and I really wish I knew how to stop it. And I also wish that I could be hungry. Because I haven't been for two days. Although I did eat Cookout last night, but then I felt a little sick. In conclusion, I hate auditions. And I wish I was better at them. And I wish I was hungry.